For-Syke Hospital

Uhhhh....I have missed you guys! Seriously I would have rather been here bitching and moaning with y'all instead of having my blood drawn a million times, an IV in my arm, a needle in ARSS which burned like a mother ducker and my pee pee taken involuntarily. Uh huh! Don't it sound like I had a lovely week so far? Please do not complain to me about the pile of papers in your inbox on your desk. Right now I would rather sign up for repeated paper cuts between my fingers then have one more nurse say to me "on a scale of one to ten how would you rate your pain???" I just wanted to say "well Nurse Chainsaw why don't we test this 1 - 10 theory here and you allow me to take your ovaries and twist them into ten knots then tie them around your ankles and loop them around your ears while I jam a needle in your arse and a tube in your hula-hoop and you tell me on a scale of 1 - 10 how it feels. We can just go with your answer because I think it would accurately capture my 1 - 10 pain rating?"...... Oh wait Nurse Chainsaw its not done yet.......thennnnnnnn I want you to lay on this plywood that we call a bed for ohhhhhhh about 14 or so hours while we take your medical bill on a Sunday stroll down a highway with no exit ramp. Okay...........wait, wait, I know your in lots of pain but see I think we should release you to go home with some false diagnosis just so you can return a few hours later and be charged a delightfully fucking wonderful large stick up the arss second co-pay of $150.00 in one day which reserves you one more gloriously enjoyable second day on our wonderful Burgundy plywood bed again while we run around like clueless idiots who very obviously wasted 100k of our sperm donors money on medical school just to walk around in the cotton pj's they call scrubs and carry the almighty clipboard. If you are lucky one of the actual Dr's will eventually need to come out for fresh air, so he will remove his head from his arss and visit your room for 1.5 seconds to give you some bull about some test results they are waiting on. Then Dr. Dumbass will push on your tummy a few times and ask you for the 2,545,098TH time where the pain is located and how long has the pain been going on???? Oh and most importantly they will ask you the one very well thought out question which could make or break a Dr's diagnosis. You better get the answer right on this test because it is the difference between relief or ten more hours of false labor to a mule..........wait, you ready for it "On a scale of 1 - 10 how would you rate your pain?"

#$%($&%$(#&%(#$&%(@#$(!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!



Sooooo my Sunday, Monday and Tuesday were not a lot of fun. Today was my mental recovery day as well as physical recovery. I am still having flashbacks of not just the physical pain from this week but the mental stupidity I got to discover in our local hospital which just basically arss raped my insurance company and me out of a bunch of moooo-lah to make a diagnosis that could have almost been written on my stomach and they would have missed.




All in all.....it has been an okay week. :) What about y'all? Anything new?